OPIE GETS LAID – director: James Ricardo; starring: James Ricardo, April Wade, Ute Werner, Jesselynn Desmond

It’s not a surefire formula for success, but independent filmmakers just starting out and low on cash would all be well advised to study the work of other filmmakers dealing with similar conditions. In particular, they should be watching those films that employ a small cast with few locations to see how those stories are told. Some of the best indie films of all time were launched using this equation of small cast and limited locations, the beauty of which being that it works for a host of genres. It worked for George Romero in Night of the Living Dead, Jim Jarmusch in Stranger Than Paradise and Down by Law, Quentin Tarantino in Reservoir Dogs, and Kevin Smith in Clerks. Of course, all of these movies had interesting stories to tell, which is the essential ingredient in all films, no matter how big the cast, how many locations, or how much money they have to spend. (more…)

SPECIAL – directors: Hal Haberman and Jeremy Passmore: starring: Michael Rapaport

George Romero’s 1977 film Martin remains one of the greatest vampire movies of all time. A brooding deconstruction of the genre and mythology of vampires, Martin raised the burning question of whether or not the title character was really a blood-thirsty monster, or just a very crazy young man. If in fact Martin (John Amplas) was a vampire, then the film stripped away all the magic and superstition surrounding the supernatural creatures, making them sad and mundane creatures that lead lives of lonely desperation. But if the antagonist in Romero’s film was not an 84 year old blood-sucker, then he was merely a disturbed kid who happened to be a serial killer. And while Romero himself has clearly stated his intention, the film is vague enough that it can be interpreted either way, which is what makes it genius. That same level of thought-provoking genre deconstruction can be found in co-writers and co-directors Hal Haberman and Jeremy Passmore’s Special. (more…)

ROLE MODELS – director: David Wain; starring: Paul Rudd, Seann William Scott, Christopher Mintz-Plasse, Bobb’e J. Thompson, Elizabeth Banks

There are people who will no doubt not like Role Models, deeming it, as one of my school teachers used to call me, “rude, crude and socially unacceptable.” Well, the truth of the matter is that I am rude, crude and socially unacceptable. I scoff at political correctness and the delicate sensibilities of others as my brow hangs defiantly low. And while all of that may lend itself to why I enjoyed Role Models so much, the real reason is, quite simply, that Role Models is a very funny movie. (more…)

INSIDE MOVES – director: Richard Donner; starring: John Savage, David Morse, Diana Scarwid, Bill Henderson, Harold Russell, Bert Remsen, Tony Burton, Amy Wright, Harold Sylvester

Some films, mediocre though they may be, are fortunate enough to be ordained as “classics,” and go on to live in a world of cinematic immortality where they are remembered forever. Other films, often times much better films, aren’t always as fortunate. Sure, they may be far superior to the movies that never seem to leave the collective memory of audiences, but for one reason or another they aren’t remembered in the same way. Worse, some aren’t even remembered at all. But the faulty memory and illiteracy of the collective movie going population should never be used as a barometer of whether or not a film is good. Case in point: Inside Moves. (more…)

PINEAPPLE EXPRESS – director: David Gordon Green; starring: Seth Rogen, James Franco, Danny McBride, Gary Cole, Kevin Corrigan, Craig Robinson, Rosie Perez

The problem with most stoner movies is that they are only entertaining to either really young people who have never been stoned and are easily amused, or someone who is completely stoned and are also easily amused. Rare indeed is the stoner film that one does not have to be or have been stoned to truly appreciate. And while I’m sure that getting high before watching Pineapple Express may make it more enjoyable to some people, those of us who simply get really paranoid after smoking weed, can enjoy the film with our minds free and clear. (more…)

CONFESSIONS OF AN ACTION STAR – director: Brad Martin; starring: David Leitch

Back in 2005, while at the Slamdance Film Festival, I happened to catch a film called Sledge: The Untold Story. A sharp, witty spoof of the action genre, Sledge was a mockumentary about Frank Sledge, a celebrated action star from the 1980s, who had fallen on hard times, and was looking to make a comeback. I thoroughly enjoyed Sledge, and have been awaiting its release on DVD for four years. But now that it is out, under the title Confessions of an Action Star, I find myself a bit conflicted, and find it difficult to look at the film with any objectivity. (more…)

THE PERFECT HOLIDAY – director: Lance Rivera; starring: Morris Chestnut, Gabrielle Union, Faizon Love, Charlie Murphy, Katt Williams, Queen Latifah, Terrence Howard

There is an undeniable disparity between mainstream films (those films produced for a largely white audience), and those movies produced primarily for an African-American audience. That’s not to say that mainstream movies aren’t insipidly insulting the intelligence of the audience, because Hollywood certainly cranks out more than its fair share of stupid shit. But for every moronic movie catered to a mainstream audience, there are intelligent films to counterbalance the dumb garbage. In terms of holiday fare, for every The Santa Clause 3 there are films like It’s a Wonderful Life, Miracle on 34th Street and Die Hard. But when it comes to lighthearted holiday fare targeted towards a black audience, for every steaming turd like The Perfect Holiday you have absolutely nothing. (more…)

POULTRYGEIST: NIGHT OF THE CHICKEN DEAD – director: Lloyd Kaufman; starring: Jason Yachanin, Kate Graham

Over twenty years ago I was in a video store with my good friend Kevin, and we saw this giant cardboard standee promoting a movie called The Toxic Avenger. There was a handwritten noted taped to the standee that said, “This movie is really violent and has a lot of nudity. No one under 18 can rent this movie.” Well, that was all Kevin and I need to get us to rent a little film made by a company named Troma, which neither of us had ever heard of. That night we watched The Toxic Avenger in the basement of Kevin’s mother’s house, and my life was forever changed. (more…)

ZOMBIE STRIPPERS – director: Jay Le; starring: Robert Englund, Joey Medina, Jenna Jameson, Roxy Saint

There are only two expectations when a film has the words “zombie” and “strippers” in the title. And those expectations are, quite simply, a ton of gut-churning gore effects and an equal amount of gratuitous nudity. Unfortunately, as the film Zombies! Zombies! Zombies! – Strippers vs. Zombies recently proved, it is possible to have a film with both zombies and strippers that fails miserably in delivering both the splatter effects and the nudity. Which is why I was somewhat apprehensive going into Zombie Strippers. The last thing I wanted to do was waste more of my time on a film that failed to deliver the most basic fundamentals that is promised in its title. Trick me once, shame on me, trick me twice, blah blah blah. (more…)

TRAILER PARK OF TERROR – director: Steven Goldman; starring: Nichole Hiltz

If you are a hardcore fan of horror movies, at some point you have to ask yourself, “How much am I willing to forgive?” By this I mean that all too often horror fans can be forgiving of a movie simply by virtue of the fact that it is horror. It’s like something turns off in their brains, or perhaps their brains were never turned on. Either way, these fans—and you know who you are—will pretty much accept anything as long as it has a scary moment or two and some splatter effects. Forget about story. Forget about originality. Forget about character development. And if you’re one of those people, you’ll really like Trailer Park of Terror. (more…)